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Monday, 7 August 2017

Never Grow Up: Why Disneyland Is Better For Adults Than It Is For Kids


It wasn’t so long ago that I last talked about my love for Disney, having visited Disneyland LA during my three-month trip, and all. But after suffering from the post-trip blues (sniff) – which we’re still very much suffering from - Sian and I typically decided to visit our favourite place in the world, Disneyland Paris, along with our friend, Ben. 

Naturally, we had a fantastic time. We explored each corner of The Magical Kingdom, from Frontierland to Adventureland, and Fantasyland to Discoveryland. We didn’t go on all of the rides, though, whether that was because of long queues or simply because some of them are aimed at kids – especially those in Fantasyland, which is arguably an entire section aimed at kids, for that matter.

We got up to plenty, though. We endured the horrors of Phantom Manor, screamed our socks off on the Runaway Train, beat Zurg on Buzz Lightyear Laserblast, enjoyed a homage to the Star Wars Saga in Discoveryland’s 4D movie theatre (where Sian fell asleep), and marvelled at the explosive 25th Anniversary specials that were the mind-blowing illuminations at the Sleeping Beauty Castle and the spellbinding Main Street Parade.

However, that all said, I’m often asked whether I’m “too old” for Disney. It’s no doubt a question aimed at me – or us - due to the absence of accompanying children. But what does that question even mean? Behind the scenes there aren’t armies of children hard at work creating all that magic. Could you imagine the controversy? Without the incredible imaginations of countless adults, the likes of Disney simply wouldn’t exist. And then what kind of world would we be living in? The answer is one as dull as the person who considers themselves “too old” for such things!

To hit back at such a silly and rather rude question, I’ve compiled a list of five reasons why Disneyland is actually better for the adults than it is for the kids. So if you just so happen to be one of those people who considers yourself too old for Disney, I urge you to read on…

1. Kids don’t recognise the intricacies

If you’ve been to Disneyland Paris you’ll have no doubt noticed the countless intricacies throughout the park and its neighbouring park Walt Disney Studios. Take Main Street USA in the main park, for example. This adorably-vintage throwback from the early 1900’s sports the quirkiest and the most charming of shops that sell souvenirs, sweets, ice creams, artwork, and collectible figurines. And then there’s the rest of the aesthetics from vintage police cars to virtually everything else in sight including the architecture, interior décor, streetlights and so on. And be sure to look up when you go inside the stores, too. Obviously watch where you’re going – shopping here can be a beautiful nightmare - but inside you might see Tinkerbell smiling down on you, or perhaps you’re in the World of Disney in Disney Village just outside the parks, where you’ll see some of your favourite characters overhead in a hot air balloon! To say children are blind to all of this is unfair, but let’s face it – for the most part, they don’t care where their goodies are coming from.

At Disney, the magic is in the detail

2. They don’t appreciate things as much as we do

Unfortunately this is true. While I have no kids of my own, it would be easy for someone to point out that I don’t know what I’m talking about, but I am well aware as to the existence of such beings. I was one myself once, and with plenty of brothers and sisters and a pair of eyes that still work when visiting theme parks and zoos, I’m able to recognise – especially these days – just how spoilt and brattish most kids really are. There are exceptions, of course. Many kids are pleasant and appreciative, but most of the time Disneyland Paris is teeming with those who, for reasons unknown, prefer to screw their face up until it goes hot-red and make a sound that doesn’t sound anything remotely like crying, rather than take in what’s going on all around them and note just how lucky they are to be there. After all, there are plenty of children who aren’t as half as lucky. But as adults, we’re able to truly appreciate what Disney has on offer – perhaps more so for those who have never been during their childhood.

A smile bigger than the Chesire Cat's - and 
most of the whiny kids in the park too

3. Almost everything is a call-back to when we were young

Go into the main Disney Store in Disney Village, look up, and you’ll see some familiar faces of old up there with the classic characters – it’s the guys from Ducktales and Talespin! If you don’t remember those cartoons, then you’re far too young and this entire post is likely lost on you. But I’m not just talking about the less-conspicuous features throughout the park – it’s all pretty obvious and in-your-face. Deep beneath the Sleeping Beauty Castle you’ll see a terrifying dragon guarding the infamous Sword in the Stone, from the film of the same name. And then there are all the classic animated movies, from Cinderella to Beauty and the Beast, and Snow White and the Seven Dwarves to The Lion King, all of which are heavily represented throughout the park. My point is that these are all the old-school classics. It would be naive of me to suggest that kids aren’t familiar with these, though. In fact, there’s no doubt that visiting Disneyland is what ignites their interest in the classics in the first place. Or perhaps it’s the other way around. Mum and Dad more than likely have such films in their DVD collections, or are happy to introduce their sprogs to the best of the best. My point is, is that Disney is probably aimed more towards the adults than the kids. But then again, that actually makes sense because we’re the ones with the wallets…

 Talespin's "Little Britches"

4. Our need for Disney magic is far more important

This is by far the truest statement in this post. Do kids deserve to go to Disneyland? Sure, some of them do. In fact, there’s no better place on Earth for them. And unfortunately, I can’t control their behaviour. That’s a job for Santa to look into. And the Devil. But on a serious note, I’m not out to undermine the needs of children. It can’t go without saying that there are far more children out there who deserve the magic of Disney than there or not. It’s the perfect place for a child who might be sick, or even one whose family is usually too poor to have taken them anywhere so awesome up to that point. Or perhaps they might just be a nice kid. They do exist. I just wish there was some sort of behaviour-filter at the gates. But we – that’s us grown-ups – deserve it just as much as anyone else. Disneyland Paris is the perfect getaway when you’ve grown sick and tired of the soul-crushing mundanities of the daily norm. In fact, we need magic more than the kids do. Again, this doesn’t apply to all adults, and I’ll get to that before the end of the post. I suppose what I’m really talking about here is the corruption of growing up. Pretty deep, huh? But being 33 years old I can now see what Peter Pan’s reservations were all about.

Try telling Ben he's too old for Disney.
Go on, break his heart

5. We can buy and do whatever we want

Perhaps the biggest benefit of all. We are big, awesome grown-ups, and as miserable as we may sometimes be, we have the money! The trouble is, most of us don’t have very much of it. By the time we’ve paid for the flight, accommodation and food, well, it’s almost all gone. My deepest sympathies to those with children, too (no sarcasm to be detected) as I can only imagine what it’s like going round the parks with human vacuum cleaners floating around your wallet. Once you’ve loaded them up with all the sweets and toys possible – usually as a means of shutting them up so you can get five minutes of chill – what is there left for you? Well I’m glad you asked. Check out my upcoming post Eight Awesome Freebies You Can Collect In Disneyland Paris to find out how you – not your kids – can collect some awesome freebies as you explore Disneyland Paris.

We don't need to ask anyone!

And that concludes my list. But before you decide I’m a child-hating Disney-holic who wishes we lived in an adult-only world, at least finish reading this post before you do. After my last visit to Disneyland Paris, it became very clear that we grown-ups are just as bad. On enjoying the Sleeping Beauty Castle illuminations, our perfect view was spoiled by a good handful of people who were inexplicably watching it through their phone cameras. No doubt this was an annoyance for hundreds more throughout the throngs of people who filled the grounds while the illuminations soaked the castle and spectacular fireworks roared overhead. My point is that we are just as bad.

Perhaps I’ve got it all wrong. Maybe kids do appreciate Disneyland more, because no matter how engaged we think we are, we still can’t seem to shake off the shackle of modern technology. I made a point of keeping my phone firmly in-pocket during the illuminations, even the parade too, but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t taking several pictures of other things. Okay, I’ve gotten better. And there’s nothing wrong with it, either. But I told myself to try and soak it all in this time, to realise just how lucky I am to be exploring The Magical Kingdom, and not as someone who didn’t happen to visit Disneyland as a child, or as a huge Disney fan, or as a miserable adult who pretty much hates the ordinaries of everyday life, but as someone who is physically able to. That is what Disney makes you appreciate more than anything.  

The chances are you'll still appreciate Disney a lot more than the kids do. But then I suppose we possess the advantage of having the capacity to appreciate things more. The only trouble with being all grown up is we're too wise to the world and the injection of Disney's magic can be short-lived as we're forced to return to the norm. Just know that the magic of Disney isn't just confined to the walls of its theme parks or to the borders of the silver screen or the television screen. If you remember to try and take that magic home with you, well perhaps you’ll never truly grow up. 


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Upcoming blog posts include:-

Eight Awesome Freebies You Can Collect In Disneyland Paris
The Aykroyd Project: Grabbing the Terror Dog By The Horns
Whole New Worlds
Why Snowdonia Is Our Very Own British Columbia
How Travelling Has Inspired My Writing
Top-Secret Project: The Trespasser And The Mercenary

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